it's a COLOURFUL life i'm living.

Sunday, May 24, 2009 Y 9:09 PM

Enough is enough. Brave it through.

The cycle of band starts all over again. The feeling of having to return to school on a Saturday feels weird out of a sudden. I need time to adapt. Morning run/jog was fine. We ran ten whole rounds in ten minutes. I walked for a round though. I feel so awesome to exercise after such a long time!

Only the Secondary threes marched today. Pretty fun, we get to laugh and learn from one another. We got singled out to command the squad. Funny yet scary. I was trembling like mad when I shouted the command. Like you have to stand in the middle of the parade square and shout to the other end. {shivers} Oh, the commands were all in Malay and they all sound so funny coming out from my mouth. Kebealcan puseng. However you spell it.

Started on a new song. So disorganized. Do you know that setting up stands is also part of setting up the instruments? Something happened along the way and I broke down. I DIDN'T WANT TO ___. I just can't help it. That is what I'll do when I'm angry. Thanks bestie and co for letting me whack you, scream and laugh my head off to see the "wrestling scene". Sorry Michael and Fayyad, I can't say it out. I don't want anybody to take sides.
Had American marching after rehearsals. I prefer to command in English so much more to Malay. Furthermore, I don't have to shout (: Fayyad and Michael, sabo me huh! You waittttttttt!
I'm sorry Cindy, Mei Qi and Permyod. I didn't show the behaviour I'm supposed to.

Church was better than last weeks (: I enjoyed worship a lot. We were teasing Wan Ru all the way throughout service and during lunch. One month of honeymoon... I want it too! D:
Gained fatssssssssssss and went home to do stupid Chemistry homework.

I hate being the youngest, being outcasted by the family, being left aside, having no stand.
You guys pity other families who have family problems. Yes, they might have greater problems than us. You comment but have you reflected on our family? Have you gave a thought on how I feel? NO.

Why do I feel this way? Its because I'm concerned. Are you concerned or do you care about playing? Can you understand what I felt at that point? Your actions is so inconsiderate I cannot stand it. Don't blame me for walking off. So what if you are the best player amongst us? Fine. You can have whatever you want. I won't argue with you. I will just step back. You can take everything do anything that pleases yourself. I am sick and tired. I don't want to care. I don't have the energy loving them, being caring and nice anymore.

I'm very very frustrated with myself. Me myself don't know what is the problem with me. I have all sorts of feelings now. Dejected, unhappy everything. I need a cowseller.

LOVE TAGS REPLIES :D

Yue Qin - Hello (:
Nadiah - I miss you ttm!
Pearlyn - hahaha. Cause you love me no more D:
Fayyad - Just don't side, don't assume and treat as if nothing has happened k (:
Qian Ling - I guess so... Nothing happened(: Concentrate on your O levels! No. We don't have the same faceeeeeeeeeeeeeee!